Wow. I’d had a nice little run of seeing some pretty enjoyable movies up until now. Morbid, violently depressing, and oddly unbelievable, Death Sentence left me feeling like I’d been suckered. First let me say that I’m a fan of revenge flicks, but what Death Sentence lacked was a degree of plausibility. Everything about this Kevin Bacon (The Woodsman) flick stretched the bounds of patience.

Bacon plays Nicholas Hume, an executive with the picture-perfect family. He has a loving wife and two good kids. His oldest son Brendan is a star hockey player with a bright future. Things couldn’t be more wonderful, until one fateful night Brendan becomes the victim of a most gruesome crime, a gang initiation murder. When the district attorney tells Nick that his best bet is to hope for 3-5 years for his son’s killer, he decides to dish out his own brand of justice. What follows is a deadly back-and-forth game of “one upsmanship” between Nick and the gang. We want to cheer for Nick, as the loss of his oldest child is both devastating and tragic. However, the movie ventures into ridiculous territory fairly quickly. For example, as Nick literally runs for his life, bad guys fire bullets from close range that magically miss their mark, despite being shot from a distance of about 10 feet. In the beginning of the movie Nick is hapless, defeating his adversaries by sheer luck and resourcefulness. By the end of the movie, he’s some kind of gun-wielding badass, beating people up left and right. I wasn’t buying it. Additionally, the police detective working the case (Aisha Tyler) doesn’t seem too concerned that Nick has taken the law into his own hands. Yeah right! I know it’s a movie, but I don’t deal in foolishness. The one positive thing about the movie was that the beginning portion depicting the aftermath of Brendan’s murder was touching, characterized by the essence of grief and despair. It seemed almost voyeuristic, a glimpse into a family’s very real attempt to cope with the unthinkable. However, one good sequence does not make a movie. An overall downer, Death Sentence is one to skip; a fitting name for a movie that is sure to flop at the box office.

Everything has its place. That’s why I love the movies. The offerings run the gamut from cinematic masterpieces like The Godfather to stoner flicks like Half Baked. And it’s all good. Illegal Tender will not go down as one of the greats, and that’s fine. Most movies don’t fall into that category anyway. What I will say about Illegal Tender is that it is a supremely entertaining crime drama, a tale of a young man who must confront the ghosts of his parents’ past.

Rick Gonzalez (Biker Boyz) plays Wilson Deleon Jr., a young man whose life is pretty carefree until situations cause him to question the things and people around him, namely his mother Millie (Wanda De Jesus of Blood Work) and the reasons why they have to move to a new town every few years. Reluctantly, she tells him bits and pieces about the father he never knew, outlining why they must flee their quiet home in suburban Connecticut. What Wilson doesn’t know is that his father pissed off the wrong person, and it cost him his life 21 years prior. Now, this person and his goons won’t rest until Wilson’s mother is dead. And so it begins, a shoot ‘em up ‘hood tale that is sure to entertain, if nothing else. The cast is entirely Latino, and I’ve heard that some in the community are rejecting the portrayal of Latinos as hot-tempered and violent. I’m not one to deny people their right to be offended, but I don’t think the movie casts Latinos in a negative light at all. It’s just a movie. Some characters were good, some were bad – it’s that simple. It’s a “hood” movie, so yes there are going to be some undesirable elements of the story, but in no way do I feel that is an indictment of Latin culture. If anything, the movie is about how a mother will stop at nothing to protect her children, and how sometimes we don’t realize our inner strength until we’re confronted with hard choices.

Illegal Tender was produced by director John Singleton (Four Brothers), and I’m not sure how large of a factor he played in making the movie, but if he’s responsible for casting Gonzalez in his first starring role, he made a wise choice. His portrayal of Wilson as reluctant boy-becoming-man was authentic. Likewise, De Jesus’ performance as his tough-as-nails mother was perfect. She was a bad-ass, like a cross between the Bride from Kill Bill and June Cleaver. One minute she’s making a peanut butter and jelly sandwich for Wilson’s little brother, the next minute she’s got a burner in each hand, ready to peel back some caps. Although this movie won’t be winning any awards for its screenplay, there was never a dull moment and it’s worth checking out.

Superbad is the mildly anticipated teen romp from writer/actor Seth Rogen of The 40 Year Old Virgin and Knocked Up. It follows a day in the life of two socially awkward best friends as they near the end of high school. A hallmark of any good, male-driven teen movie is the quest of its protagonist(s) to get laid, and Superbad is no exception. To say that Seth and Evan, along with their pal “McLovin” wouldn’t mind a little female attention would be the understatement of the century. Luck may be on the boys’ side, as they have been charged with the task of procuring alcohol for some girls they’ve been lusting after. The boys assume that if they can manage to get the alcohol in time for the big party, they’ll be a sure thing to score. The movie basically depicts the mishaps they experience in their quest to deliver the booze.

There was really no point in the aforementioned plot recitation, as movies like this don’t rely heavily on such devices. What the movie does rely on is dialogue, and lots of it. This movie is NOT for kids. The language is sexually explicit and the boys drop the F-bomb every other minute. Fine by me, but it is very noticeable. Superbad is not the cult classic that everyone wants it to be. It’s not smart like the oldie-but-goodie Risky Business, nor is it as funny as the original American Pie. It is a pretty funny movie, although teen boys wanting to lose their virginity is certainly not a new cinematic concept. My only complaints are that the last ten minutes were VERY homoerotic, and there was also one scene that was rather disgusting and gratuitous. There are some things that just don’t need to be shown on screen. Remember that scene in Borat when Borat and the fat hairy guy were in the 69 position? Sure it was funny, but it was more disgusting than anything else. Yep, the scene I’m thinking about is along those same lines, though not as bad. All in all Superbad was pretty darn funny, though I think it will end up being overrated.

Every chance I get to sing the praises of Matt Damon (most recently of Ocean’s 13), I exercise the opportunity. Initially overshadowed by best buddy Ben Affleck upon his introduction to mainstream Hollywood, Damon has quietly gone about the business of churning out one stellar performance after another, from The Talented Mr. Ripley, to Rounders, to The Departed. Frequently overlooked in favor of flashier but equally talented co-stars (think about the Ocean’s movies and DiCaprio in The Departed ), Damon is still a smidge underrated. Until his name is bandied about in Oscar contention (for his acting, I know he won an Oscar for his screenwriting), I will champion him as an underdog, strange as that might sound.

All of this background opinion brings me to his latest effort, The Bourne Ultimatum. Damon reprises the role of Jason Bourne, rogue covert spy with a spotty memory. Still trying to fill in the gaps of his past identity, Jason must track his former agency’s higher-ups in a quest to glean info about his past. What I enjoyed about the movie from a plot perspective was that its writer(s) managed to put a new twist on the old idea. We already know from the first two movies (The Bourne Identity and Supremacy, respectively) that Jason discovers he is a trained operative, but this third piece of the trilogy examines how the answer to a riddle is another riddle in and of itself.

Frenetically paced and suspenseful, The Bourne Ultimatum was everything I knew it would be. Bourne is always one step ahead of his adversaries – impossible to kill because he’s as adept at using his brain as he is his fists. The hand-to-hand combat scenes were brilliantly choreographed and realistically enacted, and Damon once again demonstrates his range in great fashion. A true action flick that doesn’t rely on explosions or cheap thrills, The Bourne Ultimatum is easily the best film of its kind to be released this summer. Sorry Bruce Willis.

Nostalgia: a wistful or excessively sentimental yearning for return to or of some past period or irrecoverable condition.

When people look back on their childhood, they tend to forget the bad and elevate the mediocre to greatness. We do this in part because a child knows no better…their father is the strongest, their mother the prettiest. If we were to look back objectively, through the jaded eyes of adulthood, perhaps certain people and things would lose a bit of their luster. At the age of 28, I look back on the things I enjoyed in my childhood of the 1980’s. Michael Jackson was the MAN. Everyone had to have a Cabbage Patch. And the cartoons seemed to have been the best that they ever could have been. We didn’t have Pixar and Dreamworks movies like Shrek and Cars. We had REAL cartoons. I’m talking about Thundercats, Jem and the Holograms, G.I. Joe, and of course Transformers. Now most little girls didn’t get into Transformers, and I’m not gonna say that it was my favorite, but I remember it and I remember liking it. Who didn’t love Optimus Prime, the red and blue truck, the good guy?! Autobots vs. Decepticons, Good vs. Evil. It’s these memories that 80’s babies will recall with warm fondness when they flood theaters to behold the TREAT that is Transformers. I’m not saying that the under 20 crowd can’t appreciate it too, but there’s nothing like seeing the live action version of an old animated favorite. The audience around me was positively giddy when Optimus Prime made his first appearance.

I have to applaud director Michael Bay (The Island) for his vision and for remaining true to the cartoon. This movie was nothing short of amazing, I’m almost at a loss for words. The only flaw (which I didn’t even care about) was that little parts of the story and dialogue were a bit campy and silly. Who cares????? The overall plot was in keeping with the cartoon, and the acting and pacing were just fine. There weren’t too many explosions or needless bits of action. The whole movie was an adrenaline rush. The story centers around the transformers’ search for a magical cube which will transform the Earth’s machines into, well…transformers. The Autobots are trying to get to the cube before the Decepticons and need the help of a teen named Sam (Shia Lebouf of Disturbia) to discover its location. I won’t tell you how or why his character is important, JUST GO SEE THE MOVIE!! No self-respecting adult between the ages of 26 and 32 can miss it.

Based on a short story by Stephen King, 1408 provides chills in the summertime heat. John Cusack (Identity) stars as Mike Enslin, a writer popularly known for his exploration of “haunted” hotels. Mike’s job is to patronize these hotels and compile a list of the most spooky. When he learns of fabled room 1408 in The Dolphin Hotel, he decides that a write-up of the room would be perfect for the next edition of his series.

When he arrives at The Dolphin, its manager (Samuel L. Jackson of Black Snake Moan) ardently attempts to dissuade him from checking in. There have been approximately 50 deaths in room 1408, both natural and unnatural. The room is only cleaned once a month by a team of maids, and the door remains open the entire time. Say word! That would’ve made me do an about-face, but this is the movies and John Cusack is a white boy (we know how they are oblivous to danger) so of course this only makes the room sound more appealing. Enslin checks into the room, which turns out to be a living hell. The series of misfortunes that befall him are alternatingly nightmarish and comically pitiful. 1408 won’t keep you up at night, but it was pleasantly disturbing. Check it out.

I was looking forward to Bruce Willis’ (The Perfect Stranger) return as John McClane, our familiar reluctant hero. Bruce looks good for his age and seemed up to the task of reprising the role, but alas I was disappointed. I don’t care how many critics enjoyed this movie…I did not. And let me tell you why.

The stunts, action, and at times the storyline were all ridiculous. Let me start at the beginning. John is given the task of transporting a suspected computer hacker named Matt Farrell from Jersey to D.C. Sounds simple enough, but we know that it won’t be. Turns out that some terrorist/anarchists want Matt dead. Oh by the way, the character of Matt is portrayed by that dude who plays the “Mac” computer in those Mac vs. PC commercials. Weird. I couldn’t divorce him from the commerical. Back to the plot: the same guys who are trying to off Matt are also unleashing a terror plot against the country whereby the nation’s computers have been sabotaged. I’ll spare you the intricate details, you can thank me later. Suffice it to say that there are plenty of action-packed moments, but everything seemed contrived and I couldn’t help but compare the movie to its three predecessors. Live Free or Die Hard is easily the weakest of the four. Picture the following sequence of events: Bruce Willis leaps from a speeding police car, but manages to aim the abandoned cruiser perfectly so that it will crash directly into an airborne helicopter while the chopper’s pilot jumps from the aircraft before impact and emerges unscathed. Yeah, exactly. I mentally checked-out at that point. Live Free lacked the pins-and-needles suspense of the original and the taut, harried vibe of the third installment, Die Hard With a Vengeance. Hell, even Die Hard 2 was better than this one. At least in that one you felt that McClane was compelled to action by his sense of duty and the circumstances in which he found himself. That motivation seems absent in Live Free.

There are other movies that have similar themes and elements to Live Free or Die Hard that were much better. For example, the idea of someone using technology to spy on your every move and manipulate you with computers and surveillance was tackled much better by a movie called Enemy of the State. I wanted to like this movie, I really did. I mean, I didn’t hate it but that’s not exactly a ringing endorsement. I’m sure it will do well because many people get all warm and nostalgic when thinking about the original Die Hard, but sometimes you can go to the well one time too many. Wait for it on HBO.

Some things in this life are reliable summertime favorites: a cool glass of lemonade, a Jay-Z album (Jigga held you down for 6 summers, don’t forget) and an Ocean’s movie. With that being said, of course Ocean’s Thirteen was enjoyable. The first one was clever, the sequel was a little too cute for its own good, and the third one brings it back to something nice and simple: revenge.

The gang’s all here, with the addition of Ellen Barkin (She Hate Me) and the living legend that is Al Pacino (most recently of Two For the Money). Pacino is Willie Bank, a ruthless hotel and casino owner. Bank is opening a new hotel with the help of Reuben, one of the old cats in Danny Ocean’s crew. The problem arises when Bank double-crosses Reuben in a particularly nasty, cold-hearted way. Angered at the betrayal of their friend and mentor, the gang plots revenge against Bank. They have concocted a plan to bankrupt his casino. The overall scheme is spectacular, but each facet of the caper seems plausible in it’s own way – plus a little luck never hurt either.

The best thing about the movie is its ensemble cast, a hodgepodge of A-listers like Damon (The Good Shepherd), Clooney (Syriana) and Pitt (Babel), and some good old fashion thespians like Don Cheadle (Crash) and Andy Garcia. Moreover, any chance to see Pacino is usually a treat in and of itself. He relishes the role of Bank, and you can tell that everyone genuinely had fun making the movie. Director Steven Soderbergh (Traffic, Erin Brockovich) shoots the actors in the most glamorous, flattering fashion, especially the male leads. I don’t think George Clooney has looked more handsome. Who am I kidding, he’s almost always handsome. Pitt too, I think age is agreeing with him. The man has a nice lil’ swagger on him, no doubt. Like it’s predecessors, Ocean’s Thirteen is slick and stylish and whole lot of fun. If you liked the first one you certainly won’t be disappointed.

Wow. Now this is what I’m talking about, this is how you do a psychological thriller. Mr. Brooks embodied all the best of the genre: suspense, a demented and brilliant villain, sexual undertones and more than a few twists and turns.

Kevin Costner (The Upside of Anger) is Earl Brooks, a wealthy entrepreneur and socialite. He has a lovely wife, Emma (Marg Helgenberger of CSI) and a daughter in college. He seems normal enough, but it’s established very early that the man is one fry short of a Happy Meal. He has an alter-ego/split personality/imaginary friend named Marshall, played by the wonderful William Hurt (A History of Violence). As Mr. Brooks and his wife drive home after a gala, he and Marshall exchange testy banter about whether or not Brooks should resume his serial killer ways. He’s taken a two year hiatus from murdering innocents, and Marshall is ready to get back in the fray. It doesn’t take much convincing, and soon Brooks is at it again, murdering in chilling, calculating fashion. I don’t want to give too much away, but you can tell from the commercials and Costner’s recent TV appearances that his character is the psychopath- I haven’t spoiled anything by revealing that little nugget. Rounding out the major players are comedian Dane Cook (Employee of the Month) and Demi Moore (Bobby) as a detective tracking Brooks. Both are fantastic in their respective roles, especially Cook. He brought an unnerving intensity to his character, and Moore was convincing as a smart, tough-as-nails cop.

Mr. Brooks is nearly flawless, faltering only briefly with a side story pertaining to Demi Moore’s character. Kevin Costner portrayed Brooks effortlessly as a man who kills in cold blood then goes home to make love to his wife. The movie is captivating from start to finish, and blends in subplots almost to perfection. The subplots are never given too much attention, and everything always comes back to the title character. It’s like someone dusted off two of the biggest stars of the 90’s (Costner and Moore) for a renaissance or something. Mr. Brooks is the best of the summer movie season so far, and a definite must-see.

This is not my cup of tea, but I went to see it anyway. Call it the best of what’s left. Actually, Georgia Rule wasn’t too bad. It features Felicity Huffman (Transamerica), Lindsay Lohan (Bobby), and Jane Fonda (Monster-in-Law) as three generations of dysfunctional women. Lohan’s dysfunction is the most pressing, as her mother decides that she needs to spend the summer before college with her grandmother Georgia in Idaho.

Lohan is Rachel, a wild child from San Francisco with a smart mouth and promiscuous front. We watch as she flirts with anything that moves and mouths off to her mother and grandmother. As the story progresses, we realize that her misbehavior is the result of very unfortunate circumstances that were beyond her control, and that all Rachel needs is some love and attention. How cute. In all seriousness, this movie probably falls under the label of “heartwarming,” and may not be the way most people would like to spend a day at the movies, but it was well-acted, even by Ms. Lohan. I know that she’s almost as overexposed as Paris Hilton, but I’ve seen her in a few movies and I don’t have any criticism. She’s not bad. Too bad that life seems to imitate art when it comes to her personal life. In the end, Rachel mends the family ties that bind and gets on the right track. I won’t suggest you spend $$ on this one, but catch it on a Sunday afternoon on HBO.