The s*it was terrible. Period. I will leave a little room for the possibility that my interpretation was skewed by the number of mojitos I drank at the bar before the movie, BUT I’m pretty sure it still sucked. I also went to the bathroom for two minutes, so maybe those were a really good two minutes that would’ve explained everything…somehow I doubt it. My date was snoring. If you like the straight- to-video rap movies advertised in the Source magazine, maybe Get Rich or Die Tryin’ is just the movie for you. There are plenty of good hip-hop influenced movies out there, from Belly to 8 Mile to Hustle & Flow. Get Rich aint one of ’em. There are plenty of talented rappers turned actors, from Will Smith to Ice Cube and even DMX. Fifty aint one of ’em. Actually, his performance was better than I thought it would be and his acting wasn’t even the biggest problem with the movie. The movie was just a bunch of random $hit happening. A collection of scenes. Terrence Howard (Crash, Four Brothers) has been in everything this year and the brother is talented, but this was a waste. Joy Bryant (The Skeleton Key, Antwone Fisher) is featured as Fif’s girl, so the role was pretty basic. Homeboy from Oz plays the gangster who won’t let 50 go straight. OK I’m done really trying to break this movie down like it was something. I didn’t like it. Go see it if you want.

I was really looking forward to this movie, and I was not disappointed. Jarhead features a stellar cast in both starring and supporting roles. Jake Gyllenhaal (Donnie Darko, The Day After Tomorrow) stars as 20 year old Anthony Swofford, a real-life Marine who served in Desert Storm. The movie tells of his personal experiences dealing with the boredom, uncertainty, anxiety and disappointment that may come with military service.

Set in 1989(?), Jarhead paints a truly realistic portrait of Marine life, from the hazing rituals to the Marine vernacular. Anyone who knows a Marine or is a Marine themselves can see that director Sam Mendes (Road to Perdition, American Beauty) did his homework. I guess it’s pretty easy to convey the authenticity since the movie is not fictionalized, although I assume some artistic liberties were taken. FYI, a “jarhead” is another name for a Marine and the name comes from the standard haircut which makes the Marine’s head look like a jar.

Gyllenhaal has really grown on me. Swofford is wide-eyed but gutsy, and never tries to be something he isn’t. He misses his girlfriend and wonders if “Jody” is keeping her company. He’s proud to serve his country and is a good marine, but like a lot of Marines, his grip on sanity is a bit loose. His experiences in Desert Storm show the pointlessness of his purpose….he is a sniper who never even gets to fire his gun. I could feel his boredom and desire for some “action” in the desert. How does one “fight” in a war as a sniper and never fire his gun?? Particularly effective was a scene between Gyllenhall and Peter Sarsgaard (Flightplan, Shattered Glass) as they return from a mission to find that the war is over. The other members of their troop are partying, drinking, celebrating and dancing around a fire, happy to be returning home after months in the sweltering heat. Their euphoria and wild abandonment contrast sharply with Gyllenhaal and Sarsgaards’s crestfallen faces. They should be happy, the war is over and we won! They can go home now. However, the unspoken question is “what was the point?” What did I do, why was I here?” And to top it off…I never even fired my weapon! This feeling dissipates as Sarsgaard’s character tells Swofford to fire his weapon now. A great scene follows where Swofford fires his weapon in the air and sets off a chain reaction. Men. Gotta love ’em. They’re so beastly and cute.

Anyway, suffice to say this movie was highly entertaining and gave a different account of the military. There are many great war movies out there (Full Metal Jacket, Born on the Fourth of July), but this one (I think) is the first one to capture the mundane aspects and real day to day experiences of a soldier who didn’t see much combat. Gyllenhaal was simply great and Peter Sarsgaard is a supremely underrated actor. This man should be a bigger star than he is. Jamie Foxx as Staff Sargeant Sykes is also great. Foxx doesn’t even seem like he was ever a stand-up comedian, this man is a real actor who can hang with anyone on the big screen. The cinematography and imagery were also beautiful. There’s a scene where Foxx and Gyllenhall are shown in silouhette against the backdrop of a red and orange sky as oil fires burn in the distance. Good stuff. I put Jarhead in my top 3 of the year, behind Crash and ahead of Sin City. Check it out.

G is a modern interpretation of the F. Scott Fitzgerald classic, The Great Gatsby. I read Gatsby in high school and remember liking it…but ask me if I can recite a word of it today.

Bearing this in mind, I’m not sure how true G is to its source material, so I will evaluate it on its own merits. The basic plot: Blair Underwood (Set it Off, LAX, L.A. Law) and Chenoa Maxwell (Hav Plenty, Girlfriends) star as Chip and Sky Hightower, a handsome black couple vacationing in the Hamptons. Chip is an inattentive philanderer who puts his wife on a pedestal. He discourages Sky’s use of profanity, saying that she’s too beautiful to use such language. Huh? Sky’s cousin Tracy (Andre Royo of Shaft and The Wire), a writer, is in the Hamptons for a visit, and to interview Summer G (Richard T. Jones of The Wood and Kiss the Girls), a successful rapper and record company CEO. Summer has recently purchased a vacation home near the Hightowers. Here’s the kicker/conflict: Summer and Sky go back like babies and pacifiers. Sky used to be Summer’s girl back in college, before she was “stolen” by Chip. That’s the basic gist of the movie.

This movie is difficult to describe…overall I enjoyed it, but I also could not ignore little implausible details and silly side stories that yielded no fulfilling payoff. Certain things happened as a matter of convenience to move the story along, which detracted from the movie. Director Chris Scott Cherot (Hav Plenty) also relies on the audience’s common sense instead of taking the time to reveal and explore important details. I’m not sure what the budget was for this movie, but I read on its website that they shot it in a few weeks. Perhaps haste is the reason for some of the contrived situations in the movie. Regarding the players, Blair Underwood is always very capable and he did not disappoint. I haven’t seen him play a snake since Just Cause with Sean Connery, and he was quite loathsome in G. Chenoa Maxwell was okay…some things she did well (subtle facial tics and expression changes) and some things not so well (cutesy delivery of questionable dialogue). Richard T. Jones was alluring as Summer and was the perfect contrast to Underwood. Andre Royo did a fine job as well. He usually functions as a character actor but showed some talent here. G is very slick and polished, clean and nice to look at it with its attractive cast and inviting setting, but I was left wanting more. I felt like the movie had so much untapped potential. Why did Sky vacillate so much between Chip and Summer? Especially when Chip was such a dog? Yes, we know it’s difficult to just walk out on a marriage, but I needed to see more of a basis for Sky’s inconsistent behavior. I’d like to see Cherot get more opportunities as a writer and director, and hopefully he will improve

Yo, this movie was all over the place. Frenetic and stylish, director Tony Scott (Man on Fire, Enemy of the State) brings us the real life (sort of) tale of Domino Harvey, a former model and bounty hunter. Keira Knightley (Pirates of the Caribbean) stars in the title role, accompanied by a hodgepodge of other actors ranging from Mickey Rourke (Sin City) as sidekick/mentor to Lucy Liu (Charlie’s Angels) as an FBI interrogator.

The story begins at the end and is interspersed with flashbacks throughout. The basic plot is that Domino, Choco (Edgar Ramirez) and Ed (Rourke) must retrieve 10 million dollars that was stolen from the owner of the Stratosphere casino in Vegas. Everything else that happens in the movie varies from comic (a Jerry Springer clip) to violent (can we say missing limb?) to erotic (impromptu lap dance). Was Tony Scott on acid when he made this? The lighting is stark and there are a million flashbacks – some as far back as Domino’s childhood – some as recent as two years ago. Domino has been soundly trashed by the critics, and I can see why. The story has some pretty absurd elements towards the end, but I also think the writing is very smart in other places. Domino can be described as all of the following: Action, Crime Drama, and Biopic. The movie was scattered and random as hell but I thought it was pretty kick ass and entertaining. It’s a little sad that the real life Domino died about a month before the movie’s release, but we do get to see her for a second at the very end. This movie was cool and different: violent, funny, provocative and a bit trashy. Knightley seemed to relish the role and it comes across on screen. The humanity of the character is never lost. Domino: sloppy mess but a fun ride.

I’m not gonna spend a lot of time on this one. It was not good. It wasn’t bad either…it was just blah. That’s right, I said it. Despite having the incomparable Al Pacino (most recently of The Recruit) and fine-as-hell Matthew McConaughey (Sahara), it was NOT good. Throw in Jeremy Piven (Entourage) and Rene Russo (The Thomas Crown Affair) and you have the ingredients for what should shape up to be a pretty good movie, right? Wrong.

I don’t know who wrote this crap but it sucked. It was just boring, and I’m a person that watched The Constant Gardener and A History of Violence, so I know I don’t have a short attention span. This movie gave you nothing to care about or root for, even McConaughey. I don’t think Pacino could give a bad performanc if he tried, but I just don’t think he had enough to work with. Although Pacino is a legend and I could eat McConaughey with a spoon, I need a little bit more from the movie than having the privilege of watching these two breathe on screen. Here’s the plot: McConaughey is Brandon Lang, a former star college quarterback who suffered a career-ending injury. Pacino is Walter Abrams, a man who runs an agency that advises its clients on sports betting. He brings Brandon into the fold as his new star, and he excels making accurate picks that bring in loads of dough. Of course, Brandon’s luck runs out and he starts to lose. That’s the crux of the story. So what. I’m done talking about this one. It didn’t blow totally, but it definitely sucked a little bit.

A better movie about lies and greed: Boiler Room. A better movie about gambling: Rounders. I know it’s hard to pass on Pacino, but skip this one. The cast was wasted.

Whoa!……..When this movie was over I had a headache and I was speechless. Talk about a movie living up to its name! A History of Violence is R-A-W with a capital ‘R.’

Viggo Mortensen (A Perfect Murder, Hidalgo) and Maria Bello (The Cooler, Coyote Ugly) are a happily married couple living in America’s heartland. Their kids are cute and sweet as pie. Everyone knows everyone else by name in their sleepy town…a town that will be turned upside down in a random act of violence. Mortensen plays Tom Stall, the owner of a local diner bearing his name. One night, right before he is about to close up shop, two strangers enter. They request coffee…and then the horror begins. Events transpire that send our protagonist and anti-hero into a tailspin from which he and his adorable little family will never fully recover. I won’t reveal any events that you cannot deduce from the commercials. Suffice to say that Tom saves his life and the lives of his customers from these monstrous drifters. He dispatches the villains with a ruthless, instinctive efficiency that belies a dark past and begs the question, Who is this guy? Former assassin? Ex-government hitman? It appears that Tom is not exactly who he claims to be. Enter Ed Harris (Radio) as a painful reminder from Tom’s past who menaces his family and threatens to unravel the nice, neat little life that the Stalls have carved out for themselves. I think that’s enough of a plot revelation to reel you in…

This movie was absolutely fascinating. It is NOT for the faint of heart. The violence is mind-blowing…never have I witnessed such a spectacle. The graphic footage never comes across as gratuitous or unnecessary, which is a testament to the quality of this movie. This is arguably the most violent movie I’ve ever seen, mainly because the violence is not stylized at all. Unlike the ultra-violent Kill Bill, or even Sin City, something about the brutality in A History of Violence seems all too real. It left me dumbfounded. I think a girl sitting a few seats down from me in the theater was actually crying.

Director David Cronenberg has painted a chilling and unnerving portrait of violence and a revealing look at the complexities of human nature in the face of psychological upheaval. Mortensen and Bello are nothing short of superb, particularly Mortensen as a man desperately trying to maintain his family-man façade. His character descends into darkness as bits and pieces of his former self are revealed. His once loving wife now wonders about the stranger sleeping next to her. We watch their marriage go from a passionate, vibrantly sexual union to a living hell, characterized by lies and mistrust. There is one scene between Bello and Mortensen that is too raw for words…think Monster’s Ball (Berry and Thornton getting it on) or the 25th Hour when Monty asks Francis to “make him ugly” before he goes to jail. Get the idea now? Powerful shit, to say the least. If you can survive the following movies, you will be able to appreciate this one: American History X (cringe-provoking violence), Sleepers (uncomfortable themes involving children), Monster’s Ball (raw but consensual sex). This movie was a real mind-f*ck. I needed a cigarette afterwards

Sci-Fi movies are not really my thing…but this movie was pretty entertaining — and not in a nerdy sort of way.

The only cast members I recognized were Chiwetel Ejiofor (Four Brothers) as the villain and that black girl that used to be on Alias — Gina Torres. Anyhoo, the basic plot is that 500 years in the future Earth has been destroyed, leaving the mythical government/dictatorship, “The Alliance” to establish human life on various other planets. Human beings have been sanitized in the quest for a perfect, “sin-free” society. A young girl named River has psychic abilities, and The Alliance holds her captive, performing government-sanctioned experiments on her. She is trained to kill. Why, I don’t know. Things like that aren’t important in a movie like this. Soon, she is freed by her brother in a daring rescue. The rest of the movie centers on The Alliance’s operative (Ejiofor) trying to get River back. She and her brother are passengers aboard the ship of Mal, some sort of intergalactic thief, and anti-hero (of course).

This movie was entertaining, containing all the basic elements of a watchable flick: action, mild violence (River single-handedly kicks the collective ass of an entire club full of people), and humor. There is enough of a plot to keep you mentally involved, and the cast is amusing and likeable. I don’t really have any complaints…so check it out if you liked the following movies: Starship Troopers, any of the Star Wars movies (of course it’s not as good). This movie has received very good reviews and is even ranked in the top 250 at imdb.com. Now it wasn’t that damn good, but it was better than I expected.

Malcom D. Lee (The Best Man) brings us “Roll Bounce,” the tale of a group of young black kids coming of age in 1978, when apparently roller disco was all the rage. Starring Bow Wow (Like Mike), this movie is heartwarming and sweet, albeit a little disjointed.

Bow Wow stars as Xavier, aka “X”, a young kid in Chicago. He spends his summer days at the local roller rink, but has to venture into new territory when that same neighborhood rink is closed down. He and his Southside crew must go to “Sweetwater’s” if they want to skate: a rink located in a more affluent part of town. All of this is relatively insignificant. The point is: Bow Wow skates, faces off against the local playboy, romances Meagan Good, and comes to grips with the recent death of his mother. This movie is charming and cute. It’s also cool to catch the 70s vibe, which I completely dig. My one complaint: some of the movie just comes across as shoddy. Some of the dialogue sounds forced and totally out of place. I’m going to venture a guess that 70’s youth didn’t use slang like “trippin’,” nor did they refer to their area as “the hood.” These colloquialisms are strictly 1990s at the earliest. Little missteps like this detract from the overall authenticity of the movie, which is a shame. The story also leaves a lot to be desired: it’s rather corny. I’m not gonna beat this move up too badly, because all in all it’s a cute little movie. I just wish it could have been more true to the era in which it took place.

First Red Eye, now Flightplan. I never knew flying could be so terrifying. Jodie Foster (Panic Room) returns to the silver screen as Kyle Pratt, lending her considerable talent to the story of a mother who loses a child on a flight from Berlin to NY. Suspenseful and harrowing, Flightplan was a satisfying movie experience. I see that this movie has been criticized by some…but I was sucked in from the beginning, due in large part to the fascinating premise. The audience can’t help but be entranced from the start, because quite honestly, how in the hell can a woman lose her daughter on a plane? Where could she possibly be, and how come no other passenger remembers seeing her? Finding the answer to these seemingly simple questions is the driving force behind the movie, and it works. Like most flicks, Flightplan is not without its flaws. Namely, it makes NO sense that no other passengers remember seeing the kid, including two annoyingly nosey brats who are seated right in front of Kyle and her daughter. The other problem: a couple of red herrings. I know the director/screenwriter or whoever has to keep the audience guessing until near the end — but spare me the cheap tricks please.

The aforementioned drawbacks are easy to accept when you have Jodie Foster and Peter Sarsgaard (The Skeleton Key) as part of the cast. Despite what you may have heard, Flightplan is hella good.

This is a dramatic political thriller with a few love story elements as well. It is the love aspect that is prevalent in the commercials, and that is what made me hesitant about viewing this film. I don’t particularly enjoy love stories. As I began to hear that this movie was suspenseful, I reconsidered.

Starring Ralph Fiennes (Maid in Manhattan) and Rachel Weisz (Constantine), The Constant Gardener unfolds against an African setting. Filmed in stark colors, Gardener is visually arresting-both for its insight into African culture and its gifted cast. The story begins with Justin (Fiennes) and Tessa Quayle (Weisz) preparing for Tessa to depart for Nairobi(?) with Justin to join her later. Before he is able to join Tessa, Justin learns that she was murdered, along with her doctor and friend Arnold Bluhm (Hubert Kounde’). Almost instantly we are made aware that there is a surreptitious reason for Tessa’s death. The intricacies of her marriage to Justin are revealed though flashback, and we see that Tessa kept many secrets from her husband: from her relationship with the good Dr. Bluhm (merely friends or more?) to her everyday activities.

Fiennes and Weisz give amazing performances, especially Fiennes as the grieving and indulgent husband. His character is sensitive, almost to the point of being weak. We rarely see flashes of anger, even as various people admit to different roles in his wife’s murder. Weisz is the passionate wife, ardent in her humanitarian goals and uncaring about the corporate feathers she ruffles in Africa. This film is layered and interesting, definitely not for everyone, but worth checking out. If you enjoyed these movies, maybe you will like The Constant Gardener: The Interpreter, Frantic, Three Days of the Condor.